Sometimes we don’t fully understand what our partners do when we marry them, but it’s not the job we marry, it’s the person, and so we learn to manage the challenges and emotions that come with being a military partner as best we can.

Leading up to deployment, my emotions can change quite dramatically day to day. One day I might be fine with what’s going to happen, and then the next it might be that we’re out shopping and he starts buying extra shower gels and toothpaste and it really hits me that he’s going away.

During deployment, it’s like you’ve lost them, but you haven’t lost them - it’s very difficult to explain. Other people might joke about wishing that their own husbands would go away for a week or three months at a time, which is hard to hear but I’ll laugh it off.

I know if I just sit by myself, I’m only going to sit and worry or make up things in my own head. To also then try and look after children when you have those thoughts in the back of your head is challenging.

I don’t always want to say to my partner if I’m struggling or missing him so much when he’s away. I’ll try and say everything is ok so he doesn’t worry when he’s on board or away on a deployment, so it’s good to know that I’ve got other support that I can reach out to, such as Anchoring Minds.

Before Anchoring Minds, over the years I tried to think I could do it by myself and not ask others for any help or support. That was probably the worst thing I did because it was a really sad time for me, especially because the children were so little and I didn’t have any family around me to help.

You have to find and build a network of people, and friends around you because you do sometimes have to ask for help, and that’s ok.

If you’re a military partner who is finding it difficult to manage your mental health and wellbeing, visit our Anchoring Minds webpage or to access support, call 0300 303 1725 or email us at anchoringminds@solentmind.org.uk.