According to the Faculty of Occupational Medicine almost eight out of 10 of menopausal women are in work.

Solent Mind’s new training sessions will be focussed on:

• Menopause and mental health – a session to raise awareness about the menopause and mental health for everyone in the workplace and give some tips and techniques for those experiencing the menopause.
• Menopause and mental health at work - a managers’ toolkit. A session for managers, raising awareness of the menopause and mental health but with a focus on supporting your employees in the workplace.

Donna Devlin, Workplace Wellbeing Trainer for Solent Mind, says:

“It’s really important for employers to provide help for women who are experiencing menopausal symptoms, or may do in the future, because supporting and creating a positive, open environment may prevent those affected by the menopause from losing confidence in their skills and abilities or feeling like they need to hide the reasons for taking time away from the workplace."

“That supportive culture may also mitigate mental health conditions—particularly anxiety and depression—which many report experiencing during the menopause. It may even prevent someone leaving their job; almost 900,000 women in the UK left their jobs in 2019 over an undefined period because of menopausal symptoms.”

Rachel Rounds, 51, shares her past experiences of the menopause and working life.

I can remember being 17 years old and my mum had to give up her job as a teacher due to a virus. However, she ended up with spending a whole year in bed. She had severe depression, didn’t want to talk to any of her friends, would not leave the house, didn’t want to eat, and talked about suicide.

As you can imagine, I didn’t know what was wrong with her. She had never been like this before and had always been self-sufficient, bouncy, hard-working and had lots of friends.

I was told she had a break-down, which was a delayed reaction to my dad dying four-years previously. For most of my life I accepted that. It was a hard period for me too. I was studying for my A levels and used to dread coming home in case something awful had happened whilst I was at at school.

It was only when I hit my mid 40s that I began to think again about what happened to my mum. Like most women, I had heard about the menopause, but paid little attention thinking you just got hot flushes and a bit grumpy – how wrong could one person be?

The last couple of years have been nothing short of horrendous for me and although I haven’t been in bed for a year, there are days when I have felt like hiding under the duvet.

Last year, I asked my mum how old she was when her ‘breakdown’ happened, and she told me she was 50 - the age the menopause really kicks in. In a very frank conversation, she admitted that

looking back she doesn’t believe she had a break-down but was suffering from depression caused by the lack of oestrogen when the menopause kicks in.

Back in the Eighties – there was even less understanding about the condition than there is now. My mum was prescribed Librium, which is a highly addictive opioid and absolutely no use for treating menopausal symptoms.

Although things have got slightly better, with more women like Davina McCall, Ulrika Jonsson and Lorraine Kelly talking about it. And doctors like Louise Newsom developing websites full of great information – women still find it hard to get help.

Looking back my symptoms started with irritability. I had terrible incidents of road rage and got snappy at my son and husband by constantly causing rows over stupid things.

I got increasingly emotional at work, and even got called into the bosses’ office to discuss it. He had no understanding, and I didn’t feel I could even bring up the subject of the menopause without him thinking it was an excuse.

I remember one terrible day when I had to make a presentation in front of the directors (nine were men) and the dreaded ‘brain-fog’ descended on me. I quite literally forgot who I was, where I was and what I was talking about.

I stuttered and stumbled. None of the other women, who were the same age and slightly older than me, came to my rescue (although they must have guessed) and in the end I just said: “I am sorry, I don’t feel very well”.

I ran out of the room and cried in the toilets. I never did get the promotion I was going for. I will never forget the humiliation of that day for as long as I live. I subsequently left that job after the way they treated me and the way I saw how they treated other women of my age.

I have also suffered from crippling anxiety (the equivalent of my mum’s depression). There have been some days when I have found it impossible to get out of bed. I wake up with a knot of fear in the pit of my stomach as if I am going to go out on stage in front of 20,000 people – and it won’t got away.

It leaves me paralysed: I can’t face people, I can’t drive, I feel scared and incapable of doing anything. I also get nauseous and can’t eat and want to cry but somehow can’t bring myself to ‘let go’.

I know the best thing to do is not to fester but get up and face people and the day – but some days it’s just so hard. It’s also impossible to believe that your own hormones are responsible for such a change in who you are. I have never felt like this before, and it’s hard to share with people who haven’t experienced menopausal symptoms – for ear of sounding mad.

I now run my own business and it makes it hard, as you can’t tell clients that you have ‘menopausal anxiety’. I just try to work around it and know that it won’t last forever. It’s always best to be kind to yourself and find a friend who understands.

The workplace, in general, is especially hard. Colleagues can interpret your ‘brain fog’ or ‘moodiness’ as a sign of failure or weakness. They can get irritated at you or, like me, end up disciplined for their behaviour.

Can you imagine that happening to a pregnant woman?

Society lets teenagers off the hook because we know their hormones fluctuate. We understand pregnant mothers often have a rough time, but menopausal women are largely seen as middle-aged nuisances.

I have finally gone on HRT and feel much better. I still have bad days, but it has been a lifesaver. Not every woman is fortunate to have an understanding GP. But there is help out there. Don’t take ‘no’ for an answer. Go online and do you research. Ask your own mother and friends your age. You’ll be amazed what you will discover. And remember – it’s Okay to be not Okay